The Truth of Cards

On Saturday night I chose a card from the stack - it was 17. Silence. And it was perfect.
I had come back from Ghana, I had been quiet on the ride home, I hadnt felt the need to speak, I hadnt felt the need to be present by way of conversation. I was on the boat, and the exercise made me long for silence, for concentration - the chattering and laughing of fellow seekers was irritating me. Yet i could let it go - I heard it, and could not hear it. I could stay here and now, and concentrate. And lose my irritation, and leave that with them.

A little later that night, i picked this card.
"the energy of the whole has taken possession of you. You are possessed, you are no more, the whole is. This moment, as the silence penetrates in you, you can understand the significance of it, because it is the same silence that Gautam Buddha experienced. It is the same silence that Chuang Tzu or Bodhidharma or Nansen.... The taste of the silence is the same. Time changes, the world goes on changing, but the experience of silence, the joy of it, remains the same. That is the only thing you can rely upon, the only thing that never dies. It is the only thing that you can call your very being." (Osho Zen: The Diamond Thunderbolt Chapter 1)

Commentary: The silent, mirrorlike receptiveness of a star-filled night with a full moon is reflected in the misty lake below. The face in the sky is deep in meditation, a goddess of the night who brings depth, peace and understanding. Now is a very precious time. It will be easy for you to rest inside, to plumb the depths of your own inner silence to the point where it meets the silence of the universe. There's nothing to do, nowhere to go, and the quality of your inner silence permeates everything you do. It might make some people uncomfortable, accustomed as they are to all the noise and activity of the world. Never mind; seek out those who can resonate with your silence - or enjoy your aloneness. Now is the time to come home to yourself. The understanding and insights that come to you in these moments will be manifested later on, in a more outgoing phase of your life.

The next day we spoke of relationships, of ideal partners. We shared and we recognised the obstacle that is the concept of 'ideal'. I spoke of my longing for a shared existence, not in all aspects, but just the basics - participate with me in my dreams, when i talk of the moon; participate with me in work, when i explain my reality. Listen and be interested. Participate, just a little, and I will be open.

Later during a break, with the theme of ideal partner/relationship in mind, we drew another card. I picked 4: Participation
"Have you ever seen night going? Very few people even become aware of things which are happening every day. Have you ever seen the evening coming? The midnight and its song? The sunrise and its beauty?

We are behaving almost like blind people. In such a beautiful world we are living in small ponds of our own misery. It is familiar, so even if somebody wants to pull you out, you struggle. You don't want to be pulled out of your misery, of your suffering. Otherwise there is so much joy all around, you have just to be aware of it and to become a participant, not a spectator.

Philosophy is speculation, Zen is participation. Participate in the night leaving, participate in the evening coming, participate in the stars and participate in the clouds; make participation your lifestyle and the whole existence becomes such a joy, such an ecstasy. You could not have dreamed of a better universe."(Osho Zen: The Miracle Chapter 2)

Commentary: Each figure in this mandala holds the left hand up, in an attitude of receiving, and the right hand down, in an attitude of giving. The whole circle creates a tremendous energy field that takes on the shape of the double dorje, the Tibetan symbol for the thunderbolt.
The mandala has a quality like that of the energy field that forms around a buddha, where all the individuals taking part in the circle make a unique contribution to create a unified and vital whole. It is like a flower, whose wholeness is even more beautiful than the sum of its parts, at the same time enhancing the beauty of each individual petal. You have an opportunity to participate with others now to make your contribution to creating something greater and more beautiful than each of you could manage alone. Your participation will not only nourish you, but will also contribute something precious to the whole.